jnllvllnv

RSS
Apr 8

A Moment

I think I need this moment to just stop and reflect. I am in my last quarter of my undergraduate career at UCI. Happily, I can say that after four years in college, I am learning to find contentment and it is slowly, but surely, becoming a daily thing. I have a quiet, but wonderful life and what more can one ask for. There is no doubt that there have been times of sadness, anger, and disappointment, but in this moment, I feel that everything was and is how it should have been and should be. These past college years weren’t filled with drinking and wild parties, which I am thankful for. I used to think that I wasn’t allowing myself to have the “college experience.” Sometimes I even thought I wasn’t doing enough for being in my twenties. Despite these initial feelings, I realize that this is MY life and I define what it is that I want. Not only that, but I choose my perspective and perspective makes a whole world of a difference. We can have plans about what direction our life will go in, and many of our decisions will affect the path that we are on, but so much is out of our control. We can end up in a place which we never imagined. All we can do is shape our minds and hearts to be at peace with whatever life my bring.

“Song of Guanyin” by Tong Wang

Photo credits: Skye Schmidt

This past week has been filled with Dance Visions rehearsals and performances, and it is during these times that I realize how much I love to perform. Being on stage and performing brings feelings like nothing else. This set of performances has especially reminded me of that. The audience received the pieces so well, and the positive feedback has been so overwhelming. To be a part of the reason why the audience felt as it did is indescribable. 

It’s a weird feeling that I’ve been feeling these past few days. Maybe a better way to describe it is that I’ve been feeling so many things. I’m in my last year of undergraduate study at UCI and possibly my last months of dancing. I’ve been looking into Physical Therapy programs and have been planning accordingly. In other words, I’ve planned to stop dancing and have chosen not to pursue it as a career. I’m not sure how I feel about this and I don’t know what I’ll do about it, but maybe everything I’ve been experiencing this week will change my mind about my future. 

Right now, all I know is that I still have four more performances of this show and that I am going to savor every movement I make and every moment I’m on this stage that I’ve been able to call home for the past four years. 

ilovecharts:

crushabledotcom:

This is magic. 

This is chart.

I feel like certain people who follow me would enjoy this. 

ilovecharts:

crushabledotcom:

This is magic. 

This is chart.

I feel like certain people who follow me would enjoy this. 

I think it is safe to conclude that I have experienced the most boring day of my life. 

  • Homemade Fruit Leather
  • Honey Lime Chicken
  • Jello shots

I’m getting really tired and I don’t know if it’s worth it anymore. 

When I’m with him, I don’t want to be anywhere else. 

May 2

Rant

I don’t like ranting online but I just need to vent. And I’d rather do it here than on facebook. I am over being your “friend”. Just because I’m nice doesn’t give you the right to think that I’ll do what you command. But that’s my fault for letting you push me around. I don’t need people like you in my life. I will do things for people who respect me. You have no right to boss me around, especially when I’m trying to study for a midterm. I can’t wait for this to be over. I’m done listening to all your gossip. My boyfriend warned me not to hang out with you too much because of all your gossip. I told myself we were friends so I was there when you needed me. Now I’ll only do as much for you as I would a stranger. In the end, it’s my fault for not respecting myself enough.

Had umami burger with David on Sat. Should’ve taken a picture. So delicious.

http://umamiburger.com/

Count Your Blessings

It’s been awhile since I’ve posted anything on here, but I decided to just so I could look back at this in the future and see how I was feeling at this time. I’ve started using my journal again, but I’m feeling a little too lazy to write. 

I need to learn to count my blessings. I was looking at my old posts and old pictures on facebook and kept wanting to be at a different time of my life other than now. There are so many great things going on in my life right now and I don’t want to grow up and look back at me being ungrateful when I was at 20.